I Don’t Feel Like It

I don’t feel like writing but I’m doing it anyway. I don’t mean that I don’t feel like writing this particular post, I mean that I don’t feel like writing in general. I am writing this post in an effort to just plow through this feeling. So often, when I don’t feel like doing something, I just don’t do it. But there are certain things that must be done even if we don’t feel like it.

I have at least three book reviews to write and get posted but I don’t know when that will get done. See, I think I don’t feel like writing because my sleep schedule is so off. When other people are awake during the day, I am asleep. I blame my recent illness on throwing things off. It made me want to sleep all the time and that really screwed up my sleep cycle. I think I have written about my sleep cycle before but if I haven’t or if you are a new reader, the short version is that it is very difficult for me to keep a stable schedule. If I go to bed at 11 PM every night that is okay but if one night I go to bed at say 11:30 then that can be enough to start throwing my schedule off. A week later I have a 3:00 AM bedtime and then a couple weeks after that it might be 12:00 PM. I just have to work my way through it. I took ambien for a couple of years and those were some bad times. The medication did help me sleep but it also caused strange behavior and blackouts.

Apparently, I also don’t feel much like reading. I’ve been working on a book for three days and it is a rough going. The book itself is not bad although the narration could be better. I just don’t think it is fitting my current mood. I think I may have to put it down and then pick it up again in a few months, starting from the beginning. I won’t say the name of the book but you can probably guess if you follow my Goodreads Profile.

I don’t know if my lower level of reading interest is due to the book, due to the fact that every time I try to read I fall asleep, due to the fact I’m on an odd schedule or some other factor I have yet to determine.

Right now I am watching ‘The Splat’ on ‘Teen Nick’. ‘Ren and Stimpy’ is the show currently airing, earlier I was watching ‘Doug’. I think I’m going to enjoy this programming block.

Well, I have to figure out what to do now that I’m awake. It is after midnight as I write this and I have already eaten. I’ll probably try to sleep again to see if I can force myself back into a more normal pattern.

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